Since most of my friends are non-Catholic, nonpracticing, or nonbelievers, I don’t have many opportunities to talk about my Catholic faith, a central part of my life. Therefore, I’ve never mentioned to them that I help out in a small chapel that celebrates Mass every day. In a world where it’s become increasingly difficult to practice my faith, my chapel duties have become a sort of refuge. 

I have been a practicing Catholic all my life, but I’m not as devout as I’d like to be. When I attend Mass, I either get distracted or fall asleep. I try to do my personal prayers, but I always end up opening the social media apps on my phone. I’ve habitually said the Rosary everyday for years, but I pray it as fast as I can to get it over with. I say my usual prayers mostly out of routine than out of devotion. I may look like I’m praying in a church, but I’m probably thinking about mundane matters, like my next meal. I sometimes curse under my breath when I’m angry or annoyed. I’ve gotten lukewarm in the practice of my faith, so when the opportunity came to help out in the chapel, I decided to commit myself to it, in an effort to improve in my piety. 

Taking care of a chapel is a special job because it involves handling things directly related to worship. It therefore needs a lot of care, concentration, and reverence. I am clumsy and disorderly by nature so I struggled a bit in the beginning. I handle valuable items like priests’ vestments, sacred vessels, missals, and lectionaries. I have to keep them in perfect condition to make them last for many years to come. 

As my chapel duties could easily end up becoming a chore, I try to keep in mind the transcendental value of the job. A central part of it is preparing for the celebration of the Holy Eucharist. One can say that I work “behind the scenes” of the Mass. I prepare the altar bread and the wine that we Catholics believe will become the Body and Blood of Christ. I say a little prayer as I do this, an act of faith that this food and drink is to become Jesus himself. 

I set the vestments carefully, out of respect for the priest who would celebrate the Mass and represent Jesus. I turn the pages of the missal and marvel at the ancient origins of the liturgy. I also read about each day’s saint, who would later be commemorated in the Mass. I would wonder about how they lived their lives, and whether I, too, would someday end up in Heaven. I prepare the biblical texts that have been handed down to us through the centuries, and would now be read in the Liturgy of the Word; I read them ahead to glean a lesson or piece of inspiration that I could use for the day. 

Part of my job includes the upkeep of the chapel, which I try to do with a spirit of contemplation. I clean it daily, to make it conducive to prayer for the people who come. For Sunday Masses and feast days, I help arrange flowers on the altar to add to the beauty and dignity of the Eucharistic celebration. Every day I painstakingly clean the altar candles to keep them always looking neat. Sometimes I would clean and polish the sacred vessels and silver candlesticks to keep them shiny and dignified. Probably the most difficult task is laundering and ironing the church linen, which I do twice a week — if I am not careful, I could easily destroy or singe the cloth (thankfully, I haven’t damaged anything). Being hasty and sloppy by temperament, I am proud of myself for adjusting to a job that requires careful attention to little details.

I’d like to think that I’ve also become a bit more religious because of my job in the chapel. I try to pray more fervently, especially for the country and for my friends and family. I have a better appreciation for the Mass, now that I’ve played a part in preparing for it. I’ve learned to say a brief prayer in front of statues of Jesus, the Blessed Virgin Mary, and the saints, praying not to the statues themselves but to what they signify. And, a small but remarkable achievement for me: I’ve curbed my tendency to curse. Having previously been a bit irreverent, I now have a greater devotion for things divine. 

My chapel duties, although mostly unseen, have been my special way of serving the Lord. I take time out of my busy day to do these because it has become for me a way of praying. In a time when many people no longer give importance to worship or religion, I try to “make up” for this to God by putting a lot of love and care in my job in the chapel. Through it I am in direct contact with the faith that gives meaning to my life. – Rappler.com

Lex Adizon is a high school teacher from Bacolod City. She occasionally writes and tweets at @LexAdizon.